OK you PoRkY pInE
by crawl
Summary: This what happens with a psychopathic dude gets board. horror! be ware readers, not stuff people may be happy with. but it's petty funny so i've heard. R


OK You porky pine.... This... is my first fan fiction EVER! Now don't hate me if I'm bad, or don't hate me if I'm better than you all. Let's face it. I'm pathetic both ways. This is a dumb, funny one... and I was stiff out bored. I hope you like, and come back soon. Now.... Let the show begin!  
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^ I hate that. But miss chi-chi insisted it....  
  
The whole story starts with piccolo. He was in the bathroom of Capsule Corporation, taking the longest of times. Why would a tall green mad with a robe on his head need to use the toilet? No one knew... frustrated, and wanted to take a piss, Vegeta knocked on the door, and accidentally busted it open. What he saw, freaked the hell out of him, and for once in his royal life, he fainted from shock and fear. What on earth could make the great royal huge ego sayain faint? We are bout to find out. So please... don't push. As Vegeta yelled, falling to the floor, piccolo yelling, and the whole Z gang fled to the bathroom door, and began to laugh.   
What the hell happen you ask?  
"Piccolo? - What -are- you- doing?" krillian asked after deep breaths from laughing too much.  
"N-nuthing!" piccolo shouted slamming the door shut. The z gang stopped laughing. Minutes later, piccolo opened the door and walked out. Yet again, the z gang laughed once more. "So what kind of lipstick do you prefer of mine piccolo? Rosy red, or flowery pink? I got it from clinique, all the way from America! Very expensive!" Bra explained smiling. "You look very radiant with that black mascara of mind, I must say." Bulma said nodding. "Piccolo with make-up?" gohan asked frightened.   
  
"Hm... some idol." Vegeta muttered. "A man that puts on with accessories. How shameful." Vegeta barked. "Oh honeys... knock it off. You're the one to talk. Trying on my bras and panties!" bulma blurted. Vegeta turned to her. "Woman! I told you to tell no one!" Vegeta barked. "Oops. Sorry dear." Bulma replied weakly smiling. "You did what?" trunks asked. "now its ok piccolo, Vegeta, all of us men has done some odd things lately..." krillian started taking out a cigar and lighting it with a little ki blast. Everyone stared at him as krillian held it up, and it slowly began to burn krillian's hair. "But on worries! That's what we men do. Experiment." Krillian explained. "Krillian." Goku started. "Now goku, don't say you haven't done anything wrong, I remember quit bluntly when we were little." Krillian explained. "Krillian..." gohan noticed the burning as well.  
  
"I know its hard to believe gohan, it was for me to, but your father is the way he is, and don't worry. I never told him about us in that bathroom that one time..." krillian explained winking. "Krillian you-"  
"Yampcha! I'm talking. Please don't bother me. I know I told you I've never smoked before, and I'm sorry I lied. But the part of shoving it in my ass, was a complete lie. I only did that cause it was a dare from this chick on the phone." Krillian explained. "But-"  
"Yampcha! Please! Don't say anymore. The guys are around us!" krillian snapped. "Is it just me, or it is getting hot in here?" krillian suddenly asked.  
"That's what we've been trying to tell you!" the gang shouted. "What? That's its hot? Don't tell me. I don't live here." Krillian explained. he put the cigar to his lips and took a puff.   
  
"NO! You hair's on fire!" chi-chi screamed. She took a frying pan and began to bam krillian on the head. Next moment, krillian is on the floor twitching. But the fire was extinguished... "Now what were you saying about goku, gohan, and yampcha?" chi-chi asked still holding the frying pan, with her arms crossed. "N-nothing." Krillian replied gulping. "Hey mom? What's better? Eye pencil or liquid?" Goten asked coming from the bathroom behind piccolo. They all stared at Goten. He was covered with all sorts of make-up. Chi-chi shrieked, bulma began to snort. "Mum! What size bra am I? And does this dress make me look too fat?" trunks asked coming from bulma's room wearing a skimpy sex dress, that was silky red with shear at the chest, hooked onto a g-string, with bulma's skimpy black bra on top of the dress. He also had red high heals on with feathers at the bottom. "HA! Like father like son!" chi-chi shouted cracking up. Bulma screamed. "At least my son is wearing make-up!" bulma screamed. "At least MY son isn't a cross dresser!" chi-chi screamed back.  
  
"Oh boy." Pan blurted trying not to laugh as she stared at trunks and Goten. "Whoa... why is everyone here?" marron asked coming in from the back with #18. "18? What are you wearing?" krillian asked hiding the cigar. "It's called a wombat suit. I was working at wombat burger... marron hurt her ankle." 18 explained taking off the head. She wiped her mouth from white shiny liquid stuff. 18 looked blood shot, as she licked her lips, and fluttered her eyes. "Come along dear. Lets go into the back room for a minute." 18 persisted as she grabbed krillian and they made their way down the hall. But she stopped, walked back a bit, and grabbed a hold of Vegeta's shirt. "And you to buff boy." She said as she took them both down the hall and out of site.  
  
"Where did that bitch take my husband?" bulma asked walking down the hall. "Hey! Goten! Barney's on!" trunks explained running down the hallway. Suddenly, trunks fell from the high heels. "I BROKE A NAIL! DAMN!" trunks shouted looking at his painted nails. He got up, and ran to the couch just in time. "That didn't look like semen on her mouth... did it?" goku asked anyone. "It was. By some crack pot bastard..." marron plainly explained looking in the mirror and wiping her mouth. They all stared at her. "I am old enough you know? Boy was it great!" marron smiled as she walked outside. "This is really BLEEPed up." Yampcha explained. "Hey... how come I can't say BLEEP?" yampcha asked. "stop screaming!" goku barked. "Ok. BLEEP it! Can't say BLEEP it either. How come trunks could?" yampcha asked getting frustrated. "I have no fucken idea..." piccolo muttered. "WHAT? You can say BLEEP?" yampcha asked. "Yea. Who can't?" piccolo asked. "I can't!" yampcha explained.   
  
"That's because you're a wimp." Piccolo explained. "I love you! You love me!" trunks and Goten began to sing. "DAMN IT SHUT THE HELL UP!" pan screamed blasting the TV. "Bitch!" trunks shouted jumping off the couch towards pan. "Bastard!" pan screamed looking up at trunks. "Sexy whore." Trunks muttered. "Yummy." Pan replied. all of a sudden, trunks grabbed pan and they jumped into the closet and out of site. "HARDER!" pan screamed from within the closet. "What?" gohan asked looking at the closet? "My daughter!" Videl gasped. "HEY! Let me in@ its my turn!" Videl screamed hitting the closet. "Videl!" gohan shouted looking stunned. "What? What can I say? He is good!" Videl explained blushing. "Is that why you have a huge tummy?" Goten asked. "DAMN IT KID!" Videl screamed. "You pregnant with trunks?" gohan asked. Videl unashamedly nodded.   
  
"You know what? (Breathes deeply) this is because of the full moon I bet." Chi-chi said against a wall. Goku was right next to her smiling. They began to passionately kiss. Piccolo rolled his eyes, and put some lipstick on and grabbed yampcha and began to kiss him. As he began to go down...  
  
ACK doesn't this suck? It's over. No more. Now wasn't THAT so stupid? I was bored, just took riddelin, (or how you spell that. Can't remember.) What CAN I say?  



End file.
